Day 197. One Left

Are you as sick of award shows as I am?  I don’t know about you, but I feel like they’ve been going on forever.  But after this coming Sunday night’s broadcast of the pressAcademy Awards, I think we’ll be done.  Thank The Lord!

I am SO bored with them.  Bored with all the promos.  All the commercials.  All the contests.  All the articles.  All the ads.  All the speculation.  All the talk.  All the gossip.  All the guessing.  The lead up, in other words.  It feels like we’ve been leading up forever.

I am bored with the vanity.  And the egos.  And the name-dropping.  And the ass-kissing.  And that’s just among the on-air personalities.

I am bored with the breasts.  The butts.  The backs.  The ‘leg’.  The shoes.  The bags.  The hair; and why it’s wrong.  Or right.  The make up.  The lips.  The lashes.

Really, I don’t care which designer dressed which star.  I don’t care how many millions of dollars worth of borrowed jewelry is around whose neck, arms, fingers; or dropping from whose ears.  Nor do I care who’s there with who.

Who’s fighting.  Who’s having a baby.  Who’s getting married.  Who’s cheating.  Who’s separating.  Who’s divorcing.  Who’s getting back together.  Who’s gained weight.  Who’s lost weight.  Who’s drinking.  Who’s not.  Who just got out of rehab.  Who’s going in.

Somebody please tell the folks at E! I think the Mani Cam is dumb.  I’ve yet to see anything worth seeing, if you know what I mean.  No nice nails or fabulous manicures.  Pretty ordinary, if you ask me.  I’ve had enough of Ryan Seacrest, and his “boyish good looks”.  NOT.  And if I never hear Giuliana whatever-her-name-is, ask another celebrity another inane question, it will be too soon.

Am I the only one who’s had enough of THE question:  “Who are you wearing?”  “Who are you wearing?”  “Who are you wearing?”  I wish someone would scream, “I’m wearing my birthday suit”, as they whip off a trench coat, to reveal their naked body.  Or show up wearing drapes, like that old Carol Burnett skit where she did a send-up of Gone With The Wind.  On second thought, maybe Lady Gaga has already done that.  Or was that an old Grammy show?

Anyway, my point is, we need something that says, “Time to stop taking ourselves so seriously, folks”.

If you don’t mind, I’d also like Kelly Osbourne to get rid of the purple hair.  It does nothing for her, and less for me.  It’s just too weird and it makes her look like she’s been embalmed.  Badly.  It is NOT flattering.  And while we’re talking about Kelly, I’m not too crazy about her tattoos either.  Does anyone think they look good with the designer gowns she wears?

Let this be a lesson to all the young girls out there who think they’re cool.  Tattoos, that is.  Maybe they are when you’re young, in art school, or a musician.  But not when you’re grown up, want to be taken seriously, and swan around in power suits and revealing clothing.

While we’re at it, could we not change the colour of the carpet?  Must it be red?  I’m sick of that, too.  A white carpet would be nice for a change, don’t you think?

Then there’s all the re-hashing.  Who won what.  Who lost what.  Who wore what.  Who wore who.  Who looked good.  Who looked lousy.  Who was best-dressed.  Who was worst-dressed.  Discussed again and again.  Again and again.  Dissecting each and every moment.  Each and every detail.  Again and again.

On the news.  In the papers.  In magazines.  On talk shows.  On Fashion Police.  In the subway.  At Starbucks.  At the office.  At the hairdresser.  In the elevator.  At the gym.  In the cash-out line.

Enough already!

Please.  STOP!

For the first time in ages, I don’t even know all the nominated films.  Usually I’ve seen them all.  Usually I’ve picked ‘my’ winners by now.  This year?  Not so much. I just don’t care.  I don’t even know who the host is.

Who is the host?

Hell, never mind.  Don’t tell me.  I don’t really care.

As if you hadn’t already figured it out, I can’t wait for Sunday.  Well, actually, it’s Monday I can’t wait for.  Because then we’ll be done with awards for this year.  And, as for Sunday, I may just be desperate enough to watch The Kardashians.

Now that’s desperate.

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34 thoughts on “Day 197. One Left

  1. I totally agree. I used to love the Oscars but now they come at the end of a whole season of award shows. I also think they’ve become so irrelevant because they only recognize the most mainstream movies and let’s face it, they’re really not that good any more. The worst thing though is that all the stars have stylists now so we don’t have any more crazy outfits (remember Demi Moore in her bike short gown?)
    Too staged, polished, predictable, ordinary, and repetitive. Quel domage.

  2. I am not a fan of the Kardashians. I hate this new breed of celebrity we have, that are famous for…well for being famous. For their sexual endeavours (that are usually too terrifying to even contemplate, lord knows why anyone would want to see the sex tapes they keep spewing out), their stupidity, their six pack/bleach blonde hair.
    As for award shows…sometimes I find them oddly compelling, but I generally don’t watch the whole ‘who are you wearing!’ bit…I’ve never really seen that to be honest, perhaps we just cut it out over here or it’s on certain channels. To me, clothes are something that are either comfy, or something you occasionally wear to look good or feel good if you need that extra oomph. I couldn’t care less if Vera Wang herself designed it and stitched it from the silk of a single silk worm.

    • Ditto. Was just teasing about watching the Kardashians. In These parts when shows like the awards are on, none of the networks put anything decent on opposite because they know everyone will be glued to the awards. So there’s slim pickings. A good opportunity to read a good book.

  3. Vive La France, no sign of any of it anywhere. It’s the big publicity machine at work, but the one thing they don’t shout about is the profile of that committee, predominantly aged, white, male – so no prize for guessing that the film that will likely win will be a patriotic vote.

    Like book awards, the gems are often to be found in the long list and for me, it’s often the best foreign film that I go looking for, something that might have universal appeal or actually teach us something. Something outside the box.

    • I used to love watching the Academy Awards. But it is just such a boring show now. And there are way too many award shows and it just becomes repetitive. And I’ve got to say, while I love fashion, I have grown to intensely dislike the banality of the red carpet.

  4. I don’t pay any attention to it. Could care less. I think that if we all could stop watching and talking about it, it would go away, or at least become less powerful. Anything that doesn’t matter in a week is a waste of time and energy. And it makes us envious. Envy creates discontent and discontent creates heartburn, stress and frequent encounters with sugary foods, which leads to chubby booties, clogged arteries and heart attacks. It is all the fault of these award shows. And you can quote me on that 🙂

    • Right after I finish my donut. :). Just kidding. I don’t like sweets. You’re much more likely to catch me eating a hot pepper.

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