Ahhhhh … it feels SO good. A two-day break from movies. A two-day break from trying to fit client work, my blog and HotDocs into sixteen or so hours. It’s amazing how much time it all takes. How much time it takes up. How little time it leaves for ME.
I have to admit, I’ve been a bit stressed trying to get it all done. It’s not like I’m crazy busy. Writing a blog every day definitely does add pressure, but I love doing it. My client work load is certainly manageable. And I’ve only been seeing one, and occasionally two, docs a day. So what’s the big deal?
Well, by the time the cats are dealt with, my blog’s posted and I’m showered, fed and dressed it’s late morning. Until it’s time to leave for the theatre, I’m busy taking care of business. When the films are in the evening, even early evening, it’s not bad. But when they’re in the daytime, it really interrupts my day. And ends up putting pressure on me.
When you’re going to regular movies during the year, you just have to get there before they start. Even if you’ve got seconds to spare. But with festivals you want to get there at least a half hour prior; and, if you’re particular about where you sit (aisle seats, close or far away from the screen, etc.) you have to line up early. An hour or even more before the film is scheduled to begin.
So a forty-five minute documentary (plus another fifteen or so minutes for Q&A), playing at a theatre about ten minutes from where you live (if you’re lucky like I am), really takes you away from your desk for close to two and a half hours.
This is new for me. In all the years I went to TIFF (Toronto International Film Festival) I had a full-time job. And I always booked the time off. Took it as vacation. So I had nothing else to do, but go to movies.
Now I’m self-employed. And because I have projects on the go, this isn’t a holiday for me.
Big, big difference.
Thankfully my friend, Marilyn, said she only wanted to see ten films. Because left to my own devices, I would most certainly have gone for more. Maybe not fifty like I used to do, but twenty or thirty for sure.
Guaranteed I would have ended up giving a lot of my tickets away. There’s no way I could have managed.
As it is I’m tired. Happy, because I love cinema as much as I love writing. And sitting in front of a big screen, being transported to far away places, getting lost in wonderful stories and generally escaping for a couple of hours is one of my favourite past times. But I’m tired.
Waking up yesterday morning, knowing I was as free as a bird, was a fabulous feeling. Liberating. Knowing once my blog was done I could relax put a huge smile on my face. I did have to go grocery shopping, but it was no big deal. My fridge looked like Mother Hubbard’s cupboard. Something had to be sacrificed and it turned out to be food. We ate out a lot, instead. In the long run it was much easier; and it meant once I was home, after the movies were done, I could get back to work. Because most days I didn’t have time to get all my writing done before I left.
How am I spending my two days? Not making plans. Not thinking about what I have to do, or where I have to be. Doing nothing if that’s what I feel like doing. Or doing whatever I decide I want to do, on the spur of the moment.
What I’m doing is, I’m taking a rest from schedules. From constantly looking at my watch. From making sure I’m on time.
And you have NO idea how great it feels.