What is it about some people?

Have you ever wondered why it is you like some people and can’t stand others?  And vice versa, I’m sure.  I’m not talking about people you know pretty well dislikeand develop an aversion to at some point, for some reason.  The answer to that is obvious.  I’m talking about people you barely know, or even those you’ve never met– and still, they rub you the wrong way.

You know, dislike on first sight.  Or even without sight.  Just plain dislike.

Do they send off some sort of scent that’s off-putting?  Or pheromones?  Really bad vibes?  Do they have an aura about them?

Logically it makes no sense.  How can you not like someone you don’t know?  And yet
it happens, at least to me.

Take Margaret Wente, for example.  She’s an OpEd columnist for the Toronto Globe and Mail.  There was a time I really enjoyed her columns.  Heard her speak once, which I also thoroughly enjoyed.  Then, about a year or two ago, it all went sour for me.

And before you look at me like I’m completely daft and tell me the issue is simply that I don’t like what she’s saying, let me assure you, you’re wrong.  I don’t always agree with her, that’s very true.  Even when I liked her I didn’t always agree.  But that’s why she’s there.  To provoke thought and debate.

It’s something else.  There’s an air about her.  An attitude.  An arrogance.  A superiority.  A looking down her nose, a “let them eat cake.”  A condescending tone.  An edge.  I can’t really explain it.  I can’t really put my finger on it.  All I know is, I’ve developed an allergic reaction to her.  So much so I had to stop reading her columns, which is much easier since I cancelled my subscription to The Globe which, by the way, had nothing to do with her.  I got sick and tired of the ever increasing number of times my paper failed to make it to my door.

Anyway, the other day I decided to kill some time while I had my breakfast and go online and catch up on some news.  The Globe has some content you can get access to without subscribing.  There she was, staring at me, so I thought, “What the hell, let’s see what she’s got to say, it’s been forever … .”  Well she got my dander up before I’d even finished the first few sentences.

Like I said, I’ve got an allergic reaction to her.

Clicked off before I spat my coffee all over my computer.

It can happen to me with total strangers, too.  A week or so ago when I got into the elevator in my apartment building there was another woman in there.  We didn’t say a word to each other.  Normally I would have said “good morning” but I knew the instant the doors opened my lips would remain firmly clamped together.  Without saying a word, she felt ‘unpleasant’ to me.  And it was obviously reciprocal because she never even glanced over at me.

There was just something about her and it was clear, right then and there, we wouldn’t become friends any time soon.  Don’t ask me what it was.  All I know is, we rode down to the lobby in total silence and exited the building, heading in different directions.  Literally and figuratively.

Weird, right??

Yet, I have never met a dog or a cat I haven’t really liked.

10 thoughts on “What is it about some people?

    • I agree, it is. And it also happens to me — disliking someone and then changing my mind. I guess the key is keeping an open mind and being ready to give someone another chance 🙂

  1. I know exactly what you mean.
    I’ve been experimenting with the idea of complimenting complainers and bring nice to people even if they seem rude.
    It help prevent my prickly response. I know I’m not the “mean” one.

    • Cool idea. Let me know if it works :). To be perfectly honest I am sure there are times when I AM the prickly one. I hope it’s not often and I also hope I’m self-aware enough that I get myself out of it when I am like that. And even then I’ll bet there are some people who still won’t like me 🙂

  2. I have always liked animals better than people. They don’t have an agenda (except for wanting food or scratches) and they don’t judge. When I did human resource work there was one woman who grated on me. She was in my office at least twice a year with a complaint. Sometimes they were legitimate but I had to swallow hard to get over my bias.

  3. I’m definitely familiar with that feeling. A phrase you hear a lot here is “she rubs me the wrong way.” You can’t put your finger on the exactly why, or what it is about the person. Just a vague feeling of instant dislike.

  4. I’m too old to kiss butt especially with strangers. I do it all day with my clients. Hell if I’m gonna do it to a evil looking woman in an elevator. I have always been the one to smile first. Always. Then it actually became personal & hurtful to me when they didn’t reciprocate. So. I’m done with that now. I think after I lost my Dad and I thought my true friends would at least send me a card or flowers to the funeral and that didn’t happen ( not 1 card, not 1 flower). I changed. I only trust my animals now b

    • I am sorry your friends weren’t there for you when you really needed them. Hardly what I would call a ‘friend.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.